A Bissel Jewish Folk Wisdom

Wisdom of Einstein, Meir and Allen.. plus unknown Yiddish-speaking sages

Hillel Mazanksy passed this item along from one of his many e-mail correspondents and we couldn't resist sharing these words of
wisdom from such sages as Albert Einstein, Golda Meir and Woody
Allen. But please sit towards the back, not on the edge, of your chair.
We wouldn't want that you should fall and hurt yourself laughing..

Clothing

*When his wife asked him to change clothes to meet the German Ambassador: If they want to see me, here I am. If they want to see my clothes, open my closet and show them my suits. ~ Albert Einstein

Counting

*Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted count s~ Albert Einstein

Death

*I don't want to become immortal through my work. I want to become immortal through not dying. ~ Woody Allen

*I'm not afraid of dying - I just don't want to be there when it happens! ~ Woody Allen

Education

*Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned
in school. ~ Albert Einstein

Equilibrium

*Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep
moving ~Albert Einstein

Friends

*One old friend is better than two new ones. ~ Yiddish Proverb

*Old friends, like old wines, don't lose their flavor ~ Jewish Proverb

Geniuses

*Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.~ Albert Einstein

Gossip

*What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth ~ Yiddish Proverb

Hero

*A hero is someone who can keep his mouth shut when he is right. ~ Yiddish Proverb

Humility

*"Don't be so humble - you are not that great."~ Golda Meir to a visiting diplomat

Imagination

*Imagination is more important than knowledge. ~ (Sign hanging in Einstein's office at Princeton)

In-Laws

*One of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good
enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest
grandchild in the world. ~Jewish Proverb

Income Taxes

*The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax ~ Albert Einstein

Neighbors

*Ask about your neighbors, then buy the house. ~Yiddish Proverb

Pessimism

*Pessimism is a luxury that a Jew can never allow himself. ~ Golda Meir

Pragmatism

*You can't control the wind, but you can adjust your sails. ~ Yiddish proverb

Problem-Solving

*We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used
when we created them. ~ Albert Einstein

Rich/Poor

*If the rich could hire other people to die for them, the Poor could
make a wonderful living. ~ Yiddish Proverb

Wise/ Foolish
*The wise man, even when he holds his tongue, says more than
the fool when he speaks. ~ Yiddish Proverb

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------0

Jews in the News -------------------------------------------------------------
News spotters: Dan Brin in Los Angeles, Donald H. Harrison in San Diego. To see a
source story click on the link within the respective paragraph. If you spot a Jewish-interest
story in your favorite publication, please send us the link.
_______________________________________________________________________

*Since U.S. Dist. Court Judge Jeremy Fogel put California executions
on hold last year, researchers have been studying ways of administering lethal injections to death row inmates without causing them extra
suffering. A story by Karen Kaplan is in today's Los Angeles Times.

*Prodded by Los Angeles City Planning Director Gail Goldberg,
members of the Los Angeles Planning Commission decide to play a
more activist role. The story by Steve Hymon is in today's Los Angeles Times.

*Pulitzer Prize winning journalist David Halberstram died yesterday
in a car crash in Menlo Park, Calif. John M. Glionna and Stuart
Silverstein combined on a story including the details of his death with his obituary in today's Los Angeles Times.

*Assemblyman Lloyd Levine (D-Sherman Oaks) has been moving
a bill through the Legislature to ban incandescent lighting. Michael
Gardner of the Copley News Service has an illuminating story in today's
San Diego Union-Tribune with a delightfully-worded lead: "State lawmakers want Californians to see in a different light."

*U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman (D-Conn.), chairman of the Senate
Homeland and Governmental Affairs Committee, has been conducting hearings on how to make the nation's college campuses safer.
The story by Adam Schreck is in today's Los Angeles Times.

*U.S. Senators Charles Schumer (D-NY) and Arlen Specter (R-Penn.)
do not share President George W. Bush's favorable reaction to the appearance of Attorney General Alberto Gonzales before the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee. Specter said his testimony damaged his credibility, and Schumer said it showed Gonzales was not in command of the facts. Nicole Gaouette and James Gerstenzang shared the story in today's Los Angeles Times.

*Alternate juror selection continues in Los Angeles today in the
trial in which record producer Phil Spector is accused of murdering
actress Kelly Clarkson. The Associated Press story is in today's San
Diego Union-Tribune.

*World Bank President Paul Wolfowitz, in danger of losing his job
for allegedly arranging for his girlfriend to be overpaid, has retained attorney Robert Bennett, the same man who defended President Bill
Clinton while he was in office against charges of misconduct with |
Paula Jones. The New York Times News Service's story is in a package
of briefs in today's San Diego Union-Tribune.

*As Chicago real estate mogul Sam Zell prepares to purchase the Los Angeles Times, the current publisher is attempting to cut 150 people
from the newspaper's 2,775-member workforce. Steve Rainey tells
the story in the Los Angeles Times.

(back to top)

.Advertisement:.J

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Jewish Grapevine

AROUND THE TOWN—Richard Bernstein takes the title role in The Marriage of Figaro at the San Diego Opera May 5-16. The bass baritone has sung the role more than 100 times at places like New York's Metropolitan Opera, but this is his debut in San Diego. And how does
Ian Campbell characterize the story of this beloved opera: "The Countess wants the Count, the Count wants Susanna, Susanna wants Figaro, Figaro wants everyone to come to their senses and Cherubino wants anyone in
a skirt!" he says. "The chase is ON in Mozart’s delightfully funny comedy about love and marriage, deception, passion and flirtation, which will
have you laughing all the way home!" ... San Diego Sheriff Bill
Kolender is hosting middle school students for a day of rope challenges
in Vista from 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. tomorrow. Challenges? "While this is
not a competition,” Kolender says, “We believe each person wins, by
simply participating.” ...

*Congressman Bob Filner (D-San Diego) and Lidia Martinez of sponsoring organization Southwest Airlines recently congratulated Chula Vista High School student, Jose Morales, on his first place win in the 15^th Annual Congressional Arts Competition.

In this issue:
International & National Jews in the News-Links to stories in metropolitan publications about Jews Wise sayings from Albert Einstein, Woody Allen Golda Meir and Anonymous Standing Features Jewish Community Calendar San Diego Jewish Directory Advertisers *Gert Thaler Tribute Dinner
A Bissel Jewish Folk Wisdom Wisdom of Einstein, Meir and Allen.. plus unknown Yiddish-speaking sages Hillel Mazanksy passed this item along from one of his many e-mail correspondents and we couldn't resist sharing these words of wisdom from such sages as Albert Einstein, Golda Meir and Woody Allen. But please sit towards the back, not on the edge, of your chair. We wouldn't want that you should fall and hurt yourself laughing.. Clothing When his wife asked him to change clothes to meet the German Ambassador: If they want to see me, here I am. If they want to see my clothes, open my closet and show them my suits. ~ Albert Einstein Counting* Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted count s~ Albert Einstein Death* I don't want to become immortal through my work. I want to become immortal through not dying. ~ Woody Allen I'm not afraid of dying - I just don't want to be there when it happens! ~ Woody Allen Education Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school. ~ Albert Einstein Equilibrium* Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving ~Albert Einstein Friends* One old friend is better than two new ones. ~ Yiddish Proverb Old friends, like old wines, don't lose their flavor ~ Jewish Proverb Geniuses Intellectuals solve problems; geniuses prevent them.~ Albert Einstein Gossip* What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth ~ Yiddish Proverb Hero* A hero is someone who can keep his mouth shut when he is right. ~ Yiddish Proverb Humility* "Don't be so humble - you are not that great."~ Golda Meir to a visiting diplomat Imagination Imagination is more important than knowledge. ~ (Sign hanging in Einstein's office at Princeton) In-Laws One of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world. ~Jewish Proverb Income Taxes* The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax ~ Albert Einstein Neighbors Ask about your neighbors, then buy the house. ~Yiddish Proverb Pessimism Pessimism is a luxury that a Jew can never allow himself. ~ Golda Meir Pragmatism* You can't control the wind, but you can adjust your sails. ~ Yiddish proverb Problem-Solving* We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them. ~ Albert Einstein Rich/Poor* If the rich could hire other people to die for them, the Poor could make a wonderful living. ~ Yiddish Proverb Wise/ Foolish* The wise man, even when he holds his tongue, says more than the fool when he speaks. ~ Yiddish Proverb A wise man hears one word and understands two. ~ Yiddish Proverb ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------0 Jews in the News ------------------------------------------------------------- News spotters: Dan Brin in Los Angeles, Donald H. Harrison in San Diego. To see a source story click on the link within the respective paragraph. If you spot a Jewish-interest story in your favorite publication, please send us the link. _______________________________________________________________________ Since U.S. Dist. Court Judge Jeremy Fogel* put California executions on hold last year, researchers have been studying ways of administering lethal injections to death row inmates without causing them extra suffering. A story by Karen Kaplan is in today's Los Angeles Times. Prodded by Los Angeles City Planning Director Gail Goldberg,* members of the Los Angeles Planning Commission decide to play a more activist role. The story by Steve Hymon is in today's Los Angeles Times. Pulitzer Prize winning journalist David Halberstram* died yesterday in a car crash in Menlo Park, Calif. John M. Glionna and Stuart Silverstein combined on a story including the details of his death with his obituary in today's Los Angeles Times. *Assemblyman Lloyd Levine (D-Sherman Oaks) has been moving a bill through the Legislature to ban incandescent lighting. Michael Gardner of the Copley News Service has an illuminating story in today's San Diego Union-Tribune with a delightfully-worded lead: "State lawmakers want Californians to see in a different light." *U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman (D-Conn.), chairman of the Senate Homeland and Governmental Affairs Committee, has been conducting hearings on how to make the nation's college campuses safer. The story by Adam Schreck is in today's Los Angeles Times. U.S. Senators Charles Schumer* (D-NY) and Arlen Specter (R-Penn.) do not share President George W. Bush's favorable reaction to the appearance of Attorney General Alberto Gonzales before the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee. Specter said his testimony damaged his credibility, and Schumer said it showed Gonzales was not in command of the facts. Nicole Gaouette and James Gerstenzang shared the story in today's Los Angeles Times. Alternate juror selection continues in Los Angeles today in the trial in which record producer Phil Spector* is accused of murdering actress Kelly Clarkson. The Associated Press story is in today's San Diego Union-Tribune. World Bank President Paul Wolfowitz,* in danger of losing his job for allegedly arranging for his girlfriend to be overpaid, has retained attorney Robert Bennett, the same man who defended President Bill Clinton while he was in office against charges of misconduct with \| Paula Jones. The New York Times News Service's story is in a package of briefs in today's San Diego Union-Tribune. As Chicago real estate mogul Sam Zell* prepares to purchase the Los Angeles Times, the current publisher is attempting to cut 150 people from the newspaper's 2,775-member workforce. Steve Rainey tells the story in the Los Angeles Times. (back to top) .Advertisement:.J --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Jewish Grapevine AROUND THE TOWN—Richard Bernstein takes the title role in The Marriage of Figaro at the San Diego Opera May 5-16. The bass baritone has sung the role more than 100 times at places like New York's Metropolitan Opera, but this is his debut in San Diego. And how does Ian Campbell characterize the story of this beloved opera: "The Countess wants the Count, the Count wants Susanna, Susanna wants Figaro, Figaro wants everyone to come to their senses and Cherubino wants anyone in a skirt!" he says. "The chase is ON in Mozart’s delightfully funny comedy about love and marriage, deception, passion and flirtation, which will have you laughing all the way home!" ... San Diego Sheriff Bill Kolender is hosting middle school students for a day of rope challenges in Vista from 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. tomorrow. Challenges? "While this is not a competition,” Kolender says, “We believe each person wins, by simply participating.” ... *Congressman Bob Filner (D-San Diego) and Lidia Martinez of sponsoring organization Southwest Airlines recently congratulated Chula Vista High School student, Jose Morales, on his first place win in the 15^th Annual Congressional Arts Competition.